Lesson 15: Be The Influence, Not Under It.
"My life is so much better." "You get paid to do what you do, you have your own show for God sakes." That's from an interview between golf commentator/jokester/TV show host David Fehrety and Charlie Rose. Fehrety has been seven years sober and since then gained celebrity status and is up for an Emmy. He and Mr. Robert Downey Jr., the latter who had a drug struggle and even had jail time, have rose out of the ashes and look at them now. One more I'd like to mention is a Gabrielle Bernstein, who after a cocaine and alcohol habit turned herself around with kundalini yoga and since then published several books and appeared on Oprah, Doctor Oz, and Anderson Cooper.
Karma. That's what I call it. With every successful quit one good or even great thing led to another. After my successful one year quit my story was published in two magazines. My art took off and I showed in five venues to date. I met my husband. My skin cleared up and I lost 30 pounds. I can bound up the stairs and play a decent golf game. I now experience joy instead of cheap thrills leading to anguish. If we can do it, you most certainly can.
Give up the bad stuff and watch the magic happen.
Love, peace, and pars,
SSG
Monday, June 9, 2014
Saturday, May 17, 2014
Instead.
Instead of drinking I will...
My husband will be gone all next week on a business trip and this is usually the time when my junkie brain says I can sneak wine in, and often too much of it. So you need to prepare a plan. I booked a spa treatment and bought a yoga class pass just for that week. I also did some internet retail therapy in increments close to $40 each (usually how much I spend on bingeing per night). So that money is gone. Done.
I also pressed my internal FF button on how am I going to feel when the hubs gets back. Will I be rewarded or dashed? It's up to me.
Love, peace, and facial peels,
SSG
My husband will be gone all next week on a business trip and this is usually the time when my junkie brain says I can sneak wine in, and often too much of it. So you need to prepare a plan. I booked a spa treatment and bought a yoga class pass just for that week. I also did some internet retail therapy in increments close to $40 each (usually how much I spend on bingeing per night). So that money is gone. Done.
I also pressed my internal FF button on how am I going to feel when the hubs gets back. Will I be rewarded or dashed? It's up to me.
Love, peace, and facial peels,
SSG
Tuesday, April 22, 2014
Day 13. Make a date with yourself!
Lesson 13: hey babe wanna date?
I was working with an holistic therapist about five years ago, and one recommendation she gave me was to "take yourself out!" and make an event out of it. Take that hot bath, gussie up, wear your best dress and jewelry, make a healthy meal or go out to your favorite place, watch your favorite guilty pleasure on TV or go out to a play, opera, movie, ballet, murder mystery theatre. She said even pleasure myself! (the jetted tub I was talking about, best sex toy ever) You can even go on the date with a best bud. (but keep the self-pleasuring solo) This will boost those endorphins and you'll feel like a queen (or king).
Personal story time: In 1995 I went to stay with an ex-boyfriend while I was in his town to see a concert. All Hell broke loose when his current sig. other (oh you have a girlfriend) found out and I decided to find the most charming and expensive hotel in town and dine, not wine, myself in their highly-classy restaurant in a little LBD which every girl should take on every vacation. I even flirted with a man across the way even though we never formally met, it was just a glance thing. But I still felt amazing.
So take yourself on a date! At home or out, you'll feel amazing.
Love, peace, and filet mignon,
SSG
I was working with an holistic therapist about five years ago, and one recommendation she gave me was to "take yourself out!" and make an event out of it. Take that hot bath, gussie up, wear your best dress and jewelry, make a healthy meal or go out to your favorite place, watch your favorite guilty pleasure on TV or go out to a play, opera, movie, ballet, murder mystery theatre. She said even pleasure myself! (the jetted tub I was talking about, best sex toy ever) You can even go on the date with a best bud. (but keep the self-pleasuring solo) This will boost those endorphins and you'll feel like a queen (or king).
Personal story time: In 1995 I went to stay with an ex-boyfriend while I was in his town to see a concert. All Hell broke loose when his current sig. other (oh you have a girlfriend) found out and I decided to find the most charming and expensive hotel in town and dine, not wine, myself in their highly-classy restaurant in a little LBD which every girl should take on every vacation. I even flirted with a man across the way even though we never formally met, it was just a glance thing. But I still felt amazing.
So take yourself on a date! At home or out, you'll feel amazing.
Love, peace, and filet mignon,
SSG
Monday, April 21, 2014
Day 12: Go back to the womb.
Lesson 12: get wet!
A lot of people like to take hot baths for I am told subconsciously it reminds us of the comfort of our mother's womb. This is a great alternative it drinking for it brings us joy of being in a pure state. Plus our bodies composite of more than 70% h20. It's soothing, warm, and best of all some of the greatest writers and artists get their ideas from taking a bath!
I could also have called this post "Get Messy!!" For it's also therapeutic to play in the mud, finger paints,meet the aquarium animals, play in the grass, climb a tree, squish your toes in sand or walk through a river. You can also fill a bowl with river rocks or marbles and massage your feet in them. Try to pick them up with your toes! Again and yes, we are going back to our innocent childhood.
Hooray! Go play!!
Peace, Love, and avocado-honey face masks,
SSG
A lot of people like to take hot baths for I am told subconsciously it reminds us of the comfort of our mother's womb. This is a great alternative it drinking for it brings us joy of being in a pure state. Plus our bodies composite of more than 70% h20. It's soothing, warm, and best of all some of the greatest writers and artists get their ideas from taking a bath!
I could also have called this post "Get Messy!!" For it's also therapeutic to play in the mud, finger paints,meet the aquarium animals, play in the grass, climb a tree, squish your toes in sand or walk through a river. You can also fill a bowl with river rocks or marbles and massage your feet in them. Try to pick them up with your toes! Again and yes, we are going back to our innocent childhood.
Hooray! Go play!!
Peace, Love, and avocado-honey face masks,
SSG
Sunday, April 20, 2014
Day 11. Father, forgive me for my eleventh serving of Easter ham
Lesson #11: It's okay to indulge once in a while in anything BUT alcohol!
Holy crap, like the mornings after I drank, I'll never do that again! But it really helped me with my craves, before the fact that I realized I was thirsty and NOT hungry. However I'm not beating myself up. I actually made the mistake of eating a plate of just fruit, my pasta-tomato pesto salad, and grandmas Spanish chile for Easter brunch. Then it was two more bowls at home and a roll with avocado and sea salt. puff out cheeks and stomach here. But I didn't binge drink! I also didn't have any sweets. Go me. It was also fun while it lasted, and I knew I wouldn't binge eat again, at least until the next holiday.
This week to make yourself look more gorgeous than you already are because your skin has re-plumped from not drinking and maybe not smoking as I also quit, google some fruity Spring smoothies to make in the morning after feeling soberly refreshed! That's your extra reward. Look up all kinds of anti-oxidant foods that plump up and clean out your skin like Greek yogurt, avocado, nuts, papaya, pineapple, lemon, blueberries, strawberries, and much more. For great ideas go to my smoothie blog: http://www.radiantsmoothies.blogspot.com
Keep on keep on keepin' on, gorgeous.
I'm SO proud of you!!
Love, peace, and healthy fats like avocado,
SSG
Holy crap, like the mornings after I drank, I'll never do that again! But it really helped me with my craves, before the fact that I realized I was thirsty and NOT hungry. However I'm not beating myself up. I actually made the mistake of eating a plate of just fruit, my pasta-tomato pesto salad, and grandmas Spanish chile for Easter brunch. Then it was two more bowls at home and a roll with avocado and sea salt. puff out cheeks and stomach here. But I didn't binge drink! I also didn't have any sweets. Go me. It was also fun while it lasted, and I knew I wouldn't binge eat again, at least until the next holiday.
This week to make yourself look more gorgeous than you already are because your skin has re-plumped from not drinking and maybe not smoking as I also quit, google some fruity Spring smoothies to make in the morning after feeling soberly refreshed! That's your extra reward. Look up all kinds of anti-oxidant foods that plump up and clean out your skin like Greek yogurt, avocado, nuts, papaya, pineapple, lemon, blueberries, strawberries, and much more. For great ideas go to my smoothie blog: http://www.radiantsmoothies.blogspot.com
Keep on keep on keepin' on, gorgeous.
I'm SO proud of you!!
Love, peace, and healthy fats like avocado,
SSG
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
Play! Day ten.
Lesson #10: natural highs.
All kids love to play. It's fun! It is a fact that children laugh about 300 times a day when the average adult laughs about three. Sad huh? We are taught to grow up, take things seriously, and that has given us so much stress that we turn to alcohol to make us feel good. We aren't allowed to play with toys or swing on the swings or twirl in the middle of the shopping mall because we'll look weird. A great yoga teacher once told me "We are all weird, just pretending not to be." I don't call it weird but outgoing, having fun, de-stressing! Now if you don't feel like going to the mall and twirling or skipping from store to store I won't get mad. However I want you to do a cardio activity that makes you feel good and gets your dopamine up. You don't need substances to get you high. I just did Zumba at home and I feel fantastic. You can also go to classes that make you feel like a kid like salsa, Glowga, laughter therapy, a rollerblading group, street hockey, a tennis club, golf lessons, or Zumba in a class. And you know you CAN go swing on the swings, run through the sprinklers or the mall fountain, play volleyball, skip rope, jump on the trampoline, and if people laugh that's THEIR stuff. You won't see them again. You won't get arrested (well depending which mall fountain it is actually). One time I did some standing yoga poses at a golf course and when I finished I heard this "Aaaaaand she's done!" I got red in the face at first, then I just laughed to myself. So what if I put on a free show? Don't let people get to you. Remember, all and ALL of your feelings start in YOUR head. No one else can control how you feel. Really! Tell me one person, animal, or thing that controls your feelings. Just do yourself a favor and feel good no matter what you do. Get some fun exercise in today!
All kids love to play. It's fun! It is a fact that children laugh about 300 times a day when the average adult laughs about three. Sad huh? We are taught to grow up, take things seriously, and that has given us so much stress that we turn to alcohol to make us feel good. We aren't allowed to play with toys or swing on the swings or twirl in the middle of the shopping mall because we'll look weird. A great yoga teacher once told me "We are all weird, just pretending not to be." I don't call it weird but outgoing, having fun, de-stressing! Now if you don't feel like going to the mall and twirling or skipping from store to store I won't get mad. However I want you to do a cardio activity that makes you feel good and gets your dopamine up. You don't need substances to get you high. I just did Zumba at home and I feel fantastic. You can also go to classes that make you feel like a kid like salsa, Glowga, laughter therapy, a rollerblading group, street hockey, a tennis club, golf lessons, or Zumba in a class. And you know you CAN go swing on the swings, run through the sprinklers or the mall fountain, play volleyball, skip rope, jump on the trampoline, and if people laugh that's THEIR stuff. You won't see them again. You won't get arrested (well depending which mall fountain it is actually). One time I did some standing yoga poses at a golf course and when I finished I heard this "Aaaaaand she's done!" I got red in the face at first, then I just laughed to myself. So what if I put on a free show? Don't let people get to you. Remember, all and ALL of your feelings start in YOUR head. No one else can control how you feel. Really! Tell me one person, animal, or thing that controls your feelings. Just do yourself a favor and feel good no matter what you do. Get some fun exercise in today!
Monday, April 7, 2014
Day 9. Money money money!
Lesson 9: The Savings!!
You are seriously not going to believe how much you are saving by not drinking. I would spend on average $60-$120 per night when I drank out, and anywhere from $40-$100 drinking in when I became a closet wino. At minimum, I was saving $400 per month.
It's fun to calculate how much you will save in one month, six months, and a year. Then how about making a vacation, bills, or shopping goal? Four times I put my wine money ($40 every other day or $20 a day) into a savings account and at the end of the month bought a pair of $300 Corral cowboy boots, a pair of Manolos, a pair of Louboutins, and a pair of Jimmy Choos. When I get compliments on them I either tell the person what I did usually, or just beam knowing by not boozing up I can afford something nice, fancy, and fun.
Even now without intentionally saving for something special, I shock myself by having extra cash in my checking account!
What was sad about my bad habit was what I would do to scramble and get the money for alcohol when I was spending too much on "good" wine. Now I'm sure people do worse things, I'd cash in my piggy bank for booze or sell clothes I didn't want to get rid of at the consignment shop for a mere $5-$20 then get something cheap at the liquor store or God forbid 'just beer'. That is still pretty pathetic and I could have done much better with my time! Maybe gone to a movie, the ballet or symphony, a sports game, gone ice skating, window shopping, or gone to the museum and experienced much more joy.
So savvy SoberStars, what are you going to do with all your cashola?
Love, peace, and shoes,
The Savvy Sobergirl
You are seriously not going to believe how much you are saving by not drinking. I would spend on average $60-$120 per night when I drank out, and anywhere from $40-$100 drinking in when I became a closet wino. At minimum, I was saving $400 per month.
It's fun to calculate how much you will save in one month, six months, and a year. Then how about making a vacation, bills, or shopping goal? Four times I put my wine money ($40 every other day or $20 a day) into a savings account and at the end of the month bought a pair of $300 Corral cowboy boots, a pair of Manolos, a pair of Louboutins, and a pair of Jimmy Choos. When I get compliments on them I either tell the person what I did usually, or just beam knowing by not boozing up I can afford something nice, fancy, and fun.
Even now without intentionally saving for something special, I shock myself by having extra cash in my checking account!
What was sad about my bad habit was what I would do to scramble and get the money for alcohol when I was spending too much on "good" wine. Now I'm sure people do worse things, I'd cash in my piggy bank for booze or sell clothes I didn't want to get rid of at the consignment shop for a mere $5-$20 then get something cheap at the liquor store or God forbid 'just beer'. That is still pretty pathetic and I could have done much better with my time! Maybe gone to a movie, the ballet or symphony, a sports game, gone ice skating, window shopping, or gone to the museum and experienced much more joy.
So savvy SoberStars, what are you going to do with all your cashola?
Love, peace, and shoes,
The Savvy Sobergirl
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